The Official Dick Lazer

Hillarious and amazing. My cat loves chasing dicks

As advertised. Super funny. Every one loves it

The Official Dick Lazer

I've been having too fun throwing dick lasers on all my friends faces and clothes. Endless hours of laughing till you piss yourself. 10/10

Just pure fun

When I first ordered the Dick Lazer, I thought, “Surely, this won’t be as stupidly hilarious as it sounds.” I was wrong. The first time I fired it up, a majestic glowing member lit up the wall like some kind of forbidden Bat-Signal. My dog barked. My neighbor gasped. My inner child cheered.

It’s been used to spice up Zoom calls, guide presentations, and point out stars during a romantic evening (“Look, babe — Orion’s belt… and his other constellation”). The laughs? Nonstop. The regrets? None. The maturity level? Long gone.

Highly recommend. Startling the masses one glowing schlong at a time.

Let's put it this way...everybody I've shown these to wants them! Awesome!

This is the best lazer pointer a man can have. Already got people at work with it and now gonna have some fun in Florida with the boys while they preview there new brewery!!!

I didn't think the lines would be so crisp and clean. It's funny to watch my cat chase around a comically cartoonish cock. Also the flash light on it is surprisingly bright. Thanks guys!

I love this thing.

Great device! Not only do you get the childish/immature DICKS but a flashlight and a jizz detector. Never be caught with a happy ending on your pants again! Great for company meetings too!

I took it to Armin Van Buuren event in LA last weekend.... N I literally had people turning heads n laughing... 😂😂 Definitely got thaa job done! Thanks for thaa humor it brought to me n peeps around me... thaa shawtii was being a hater thoo 🙄 But it's okk.. When she told her friends about itt. They laughed n loved itt 🤑

I work at a strip club and I bought a few dick lazers to shine on/in front of people who aren't tipping or people who like to take pictures of our entertainers. they work perfect!

The Official Dick Lazer

I purchased this product to remove the massive “tuft” of excessive pubic hair around my balls and taint. When flashing this lazer onto the said monstrosity, all that occurred is a disturbing image of how my dick “should” look with its perfect round balls, and hairless taint.
This is a dick shaming device, no doubt. With five very visible and distinct larger penises than my own, it was very disconserting.
However, the opposite, non-vulgar, end has an extra strong flashlight for finding things in a dim lit urinal stall, and also sports a black light function to highlight any semen stains I don’t have on my sheets, on the account that my wife has now left me for a dick lazer. Fuck u guys!